Let me start with that it has been a very, very long time since I have journaled in any form. It's sort of comforting and sort of not. I am 38 now the last time I've written open and honestly has to be when I was 17.
This is just something for me too air out my thoughts and see if I am alone or not in my thoughts, feelings, and emotions. I am hoping to also jog my memories of times long past. To evaluate how I got from there to here. Somethings are not easy to remember but it feels like something that needs to be done for myself. Especially after starting therapy things feel more vital to try to observe how my brain works, it has always felt ...off. I remember having moment of feeling like I was insane because things around me just didn't make sense, like is this who I really am. Do I even like the way this person thinks? Am I even happy?
To answer all that yes, I was little crazy but did not know why and also no I wasn't completely out of my mind. I was just so use to following along with my husband at the time that I just completely forgot who I was even all the seemingly negative parts. I truly cherish those parts these days I regret for waiting so long to give them credit they deserve, damn the confidence that comes from excepting your flaws is freeing. Sometimes you'll find that what you thought was a flaw is your greatest attribute.
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